Decluttering and Organizing After The Loss of a Pet

July 26, 2024

I have spent many organizing sessions dedicating to helping my clients declutter and organize after the loss of a pet. Now it’s time for me to help myself. My sweet Jack Russell, Maisy, crossed the rainbow bridge on Thursday morning, July, 25^th, 2024. She was my very best friend. In this post, I’ll talk about my own process.

Maisy was diagnosed with advanced stage kidney disease in early March, in addition to a variety of heart conditions. We thought we were going to lose her in March, but luckily she pulled through long enough to spend a month in New Mexico with us. I am so grateful to all of Maisy’s vets and specialists who helped her live her best life. She had been doing really well down here, enjoying her stroller rides, getting to explore our new home, and going on road trips to play in lakes and streams. Unfortunately, she took a steep two day decline, and the wonderful people at Carlsbad Animal Clinic helped me give her a peaceful crossing. Anyone that knew Maisy knows what a character she is! From doing handstands to pee, catching plenty of rodents (while on a leash!), to demanding peanut butter, she definitely had a strong personality. She surely was a small dog with a very big presence. I am eternally grateful to have had her in my life.

I was (and am) devastated. Maisy has been with me for 8.5 years (I adopted her as a 6 year old). She has been with me through the death of my father and 3 of my grandparents. She helped me build my business to what it is today. She helped me meet my partner Charlie. She meant the world to me! When she got diagnosed with kidney disease, I took her to Ancient Arts holistic vet in Seattle 1-2 times a week for homeopathy and aquapuncture. I even learned how to give her subcutaneous fluids. I did Reiki, had lots of crystals working for her, did red light therapy on a regular basis, and gave her about 20 different medications and supplements that were prescribed to her twice a day. Most people thought moving to New Mexico was the biggest thing going on in my life, but caring for my beloved dog was by far the most emotionally intensive. I say all this to emphasize what a strong attachment I had to my dog.

This winter I showed one of my friends a photo of us. I was on cross-country skis, pulling Maisy in the ski chariot that I got for her. My friend laughed and jokingly said, “oh, you’re those people”. Haha, yes, we are. We also have a pit bull who also goes [almost] everywhere with us. Needless to say, we have a lot of dog stuff! Since I have helped so many people deal with their stuff after the loss of a pet, I know how hard it can be to approach on your own. Here’s what I’ve done so far:

When I got back from the vet Thursday morning, I crumpled onto the bed in tears, and snuggled with our pit bull, Annabel. She is incredibly intelligent and nurturing, and seemed to know exactly what was going on.
I texted some friends and family to let them know, and talked to a few people on the phone.
I did lots of laundry. Kidney disease usually is accompanied by urinary incontinence, which got particularly bad the night before she died. I gathered all the bedding and pee pads that needed to be washed, and cycled everything through. I also washed her leashes, collar, and harnesses.
I went to the drive through at Sonic. I had a burger, a Coke, and a Reese’s milkshake (that took me all day to finish). I also got a burger patty for Annabel who is also in mourning. And I watched one of my trashy reality TV dating shows that I love (a guilty pleasure). I knew I needed to let go of my normal standards of productivity and diet.
I played with glitter! I’ll post a video on my Instagram later. I upcycled our old table and covered the tabletop with glitter. Playing with glitter makes me happy, and I knew I needed to do something creative and fun.
I gathered up donations. Since we have Annabel, I knew I didn’t need to give away all the dog food and treats, but I had some very specific prescription food (that she hardly touched) and other medications. I really didn’t want the food to go to waste if another dog could use it.
I got gifts. I wanted to express my gratitude to Dr. Castro and the other folks at Carlsbad Animal Clinic. They came through in a very special and compassionate way (especially since we didn’t have an appointment). I went down to The Artist Gallery in Carlsbad (where I recently became a member) and picked up some small handmade tokens of appreciation for them. I also wrote a couple thank-you cards, which helped me with the grieving process.
I made a little shrine for Maisy. I arranged a photo of her, some artwork made by her vet, some dog treats, and some crystals. Then I lit a candle given to me by a friend.

I still have plenty to do in the way of processing this loss physically and emotionally. We’ve got about 6 small dog beds, 3 small dog crates, and some bulkier items like her stroller, a carrier, and her car seat. I plan on keeping all of these things and will store them once everything is fully dry. I’m certainly not getting another dog anytime soon, but I would like to have another small dog in the future. There are some other things that will be harder for me to move and disassemble, like her “hacienda” (a gated off area that we created for her) and her crystal grid that I designed specifically to help support her kidneys.

Here are some tips I’d like to share that I’ve found helpful

Go at your own pace. Grief is not a linear process. Don’t feel like you “should” do anything. If you want to go eat some junk food and watch some trashy TV show, that’s ok!
Ask for help when you need it. It can be very difficult to do this on your own.
When you feel inspired to donate things, go ahead and do it. You don’t have to do it all at once. In fact, I wouldn’t recommend it unless you’re certain you want to get rid of it. Give things away in stages. Contact local animal shelters, vet clinics, friends, or post on free neighborhood groups so that you can make sure your stuff goes to a good home. Letting go is a big part of the healing process. Don’t rush it.
Talk to friends or family and let them know what’s going on. It might be hard to open up. I know someone who lost their favorite cat, and they couldn’t talk about it for a week. When you feel ready, let people know.
Express gratitude to those who have helped you with your pet. Write notes, give gifts, make a donation, write positive Yelp/Google reviews, volunteer, tell people how much they mean to you, or do whatever you feel like to express gratitude.
Do something that makes you happy and feeds your soul. Make art, move your body, be creative, or do something else that is emotionally fulfilling.
Take some time out. It’s ok if you “miss a beat”. You don’t have to be perfect all the time. 😉
Clean something. Cleaning can be incredibly therapeutic. Whether you’re doing laundry, mopping the floor, or vacuuming up dog hair from the car, this is a way to physically process grief and begin to move forward.
Let yourself cry as hard as you feel like. Ugly cry. Don’t bottle up your emotions.
Observe the beauty in nature. Let yourself absorb the glow of a sunset. Listen to the sounds of the birds. This will help regulate and calm your nervous system.
We worked extensively with Dr. Rewers at Ancient Arts. She has been such a gift to our pack! Check out her website for resources on Bereavement and Coping.
Create a memorial for your pet. It can be as simple or as elaborate as you want. You may want to start by just printing a photo of your pet or lighting a candle. You might feel inspired to make a scrap book. Or maybe you want to do something larger.

Decluttering and organizing after the loss of a pet is a personal experience and will be different for everyone. Losing pets is HARD, and emotionally painful, no matter how they go. There is no right or wrong way to navigate the process. Even though you are saying goodbye to your pet’s physical presence, their memory will forever be cherished in your heart.

Rest in power my sweet love! I love you with all my heart.